Friday, June 22, 2012

Our New Day

Two weeks ago, I imagined myself writing my first post vacation post: a reflection of the time our family spent together away from the stress and exhaustion of everyday life, imagined photos of us sunbathing on the banks of the Colorado River, stories of our girls exploring the desert and mountainous terrain.  I imagined the memories we would make as a family on our first real vacation in years.

Sadly, none of those things happened.  On the second day of our trip, Shawn was involved in an accident and sustained life threatening injuries.  I arrived at the scene of the accident to find my worst nightmare come true: Shawn, the strongest, bravest, most powerful soul I have ever known, fighting for his life.  With my heart in my throat and my hands shaking from fear, I used every ounce of my strength and my years of nursing experience to save his life and keep him stable.  Help arrived after what seemed like an eternity, a helicopter landed in the middle of the desert like an angel soaring through the sky.  Against all odds, the man I love with every fiber of my being made it through the night, the longest night of our lives.

We have spent the last 12 days in a trauma unit at a hospital in Nevada. During his accident, Shawn sustained an open compound fracture of the humerous bone in his left arm, a severed brachial artery, a nondisplaced fracture in the first vertebrae of his spine, a detached right ear, and multiple lacerations and abrasions on his head and face.  I have stood by his side as he lay in ICU in critical condition, held his hand as he took his first steps down the long hospital hallway after days in bed, fed him and bathed him, cleaning the blood and battle wounds that marked his whole body.  We have laughed and rejoiced in the simple fact that he is alive, cried over the uncertainty of our future and his prognosis, prayed for strength and the ability to make it out of this situation as better people.

Our girls were cared for lovingly by Shawn's mother while we have taken up residence in the hospital.  Due to the very high risk of infection and the extreme contamination of his wounds by the dirt and rocks at the site of the accident, the doctors recommended they not step foot inside the hospital, even to visit their daddy. I was able to spend time with them several times this week, soaking in every ounce of their love and allowing their little girl hugs to heal my soul.  This afternoon, with Shawn's hospital stay looming on into next week, we made the very difficult decision to send our daughters home to Louisiana with my mother.  They need their home, the stability of their familiar environment.  I brought them to the airport and kissed them a million times on their sweet little cheeks, tears filling my eyes as Isabelle whispered, "Be strong, mama".

And so, here we are, 12 days in, our lives completely changed in ways we are only now beginning to understand.  Shawn's recovery has stunned every doctor, nurse, and passerby.  His will and determination have carried us through some of our darkest hours.  During the first night, I prayed for him to live.  And he did.  During the first week, I prayed for him to keep his arm.  And he did.  Now, we anxiously await his fourth surgery since the accident, hoping to repair some of the nerve damage he has suffered.  Now, I am praying that he continues to heal and remains free from infection, that he will regain full use of his arm and hand and continue living this life with the spirit of a warrior.  I know he will.

Our vacation may not have been the journey we anticipated, but it has been a life changing journey regardless. People have always complimented Shawn and I for our positive attitudes, for our ability to see life for what it truly is.  Those qualities have never been more relevant to us than they are now.  This is living: one day at a time, being thankful for each breathe.  We had a glimpse of what life could be and it has shaken us to our core, allowed us to come together in ways we never knew existed.  After 13 years of life together, I can tell you that I know now more than ever what love really is.  In sickness and in health, we are here, together.  We are surviving.

I promise to share more of our story soon.  I am still processing so much of what has happened and want to record as much of it as possible.  We ask you all to keep Shawn and our family in your thoughts and prayers.

24 comments:

Summer Crosbie said...

I'm in tears.  I will say a few prayers for him, you and your girls.  I can't even imagine and will be thinking of you all.

Sweetgreentangerine said...

Wow Liv. My heart sunk as I read this.  I am so sorry that this happened and I am praying for you and Shawn and the girls.  You are so incredibly strong, and I have no doubt it is one of the reasons Shawn is still breathing today.  You are amazing.  Please keep us updated.

Brandi Nabors said...

oh liv!  my heart hurts and rejoices all at once - thank the Lord he is recovering by leaps and bounds.  your "nabors" will be praying for you all!!!!

Caitlin A. said...

Oh my gosh, Liv, I'm so, so sorry to hear about Shawn, but so happy that he's recovering and totally astounding all the doctors. I don't know him but he seems like a real fighter, as do you and your girls.  I'm sending you so much love and good vibes for a quick recovery! <3

Deanna Fike said...

oh liv! i am so sorry to hear about shawn's accident. but how wonderful that he is recovery much faster than anyone anticipated. i will be keeping him and our family in my prayers! i wish i could give you a big hug right now. 

Wendy said...

My heart is aching for you guys. You have such a strong and beautiful family. I have faith that you will get through this and be better than ever. Lots of love to you. I will be praying.

Godbless said...

your positive attitude and gratitude for life has been what keeps me reading your blog. you're a strong woman. my thoughts and prayers are with your family!

Randalin said...

My heart sunk as I began to read this. I am so incredibly sorry that this has happened to your family, but am blown away by your ability to stay positive. I am sending love and positive thoughts to you and your family. Much love. 

Vanessa said...

Liv, a million hugs your way. I had to stop crying so I could comment, because even though we've never met offline, I feel like you and your family are kindred spirits. I can't even imagine how traumatic it all has been -- to wait for that helicopter, or to wait for all these surgeries, or to wait to see your daughters again. All I can say is my heart is now in my throat, thinking about you and Shawn and Isabelle and Brees. Know that I'll be thinking about you often, wishing a super speedy recovery (sounds like it's already under way) and hugging my own family a little tighter tonight. Life is really very precious and fragile, indeed. Xoxo.

(And I'm only an email away if you need to talk.)

Renee said...

We'l be praying for all of you!!  Your guys Faith and Love is Amazing and will get you through anything!!!

kristy said...

I'm so so sorry. You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers. Stay strong.

Sara said...

Liv, I can't help but shed tears when reading this, not only tears of sadness, but of joy for how Shawn is battling everything with you by his side and you all making it through this together. I admire the strength of your love and will be keeping you all in my heart in the coming weeks. 

The Tsangs said...

What a terrible accident, and how amazing that Shawn has made it through, in huge part by your actions Liv.  Hope he continues to improve day by day, thinking of you all at this time.

Michelle Wingreen said...

Praying for Shawn and the rest of your family! "Don't be afraid, for I am with you. Don't be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand." Isaiah 41:10

Hilary said...

Praying for you all!

Mattandkaraadopt said...

Liv, I am heartbroken that Shaun was in such a terrible and life threatening accident, but am rejoicing to hear that he survived and is stunning the medical professionals with his recovery. I cannot imagine what the stress of all the uncertainty must be doing to you both, but know that we are praying for your family, and especially a FULL recovery for Shaun.  John 14:27 says, "Peace I leave you, my peace I give you, I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your heart be troubled and do not be afraid."

Hugs and much love from the Motts to your family!

LeiShell said...

My heart goes out to you during this time. I pray he continues to progress and for strength for your family for standing by at a time like this. Visiting from Look.Snap.Love....Many blessings to you♥

Kristin said...

I'm so sorry this happened. My thoughts and prayers go out to you all. Please update when you can.

Lucy The Valiant said...

I am praying -and crying- for your family right now. I'm so sorry this happened. You are both warriors!!

Hilary@BabyMooHoo said...

oh, my dear liv!  i have been waiting with such great anticipation to read all about your family's much-deserved getaway.  my eyes are overflowing with tears reading that this is how your trip went... i am so, so sorry to hear that you have had to deal with such fear and trauma.  i am beyond relieved to read that things are improving.  email if you need anything.  thinking of you guys with so much love.

Bebe428 said...

Sending your family lots of love, prayers and most of all strength

Raechel @ Our Island Outlook said...

I tried to comment a few times on my iPad a few days ago, to no avail. I didn't want you to think I didn't read this, though, and you and your family have been on my mind.

Your family is strong, and you are all in God's hands. You are the best possible wife and mother in this situation, and Shawn and the little ladies are blessed to have you as their rock right now.

I'm thinking and praying for you all.

Kgecik said...

Oh, Liv, I was away for a while and just stumbled on to this.  My eyes are filled with tears.  I'm so glad he's doing well.  

Marie V said...

My sweet Liv, I am just back form my holiday and see this. I am so moved by what happened and I am amazed at the way you dealt with things in this difficult time. I read Shawn is back home now, it's time for your to reconnect and really as you say take a day at a time and enjoy every minute of love. XX