Rock'n'roll Babymoon Adventure

I saw this print on Etsy last Friday: "Today, I have loved you for 1,424 days".  Shawn
was sitting next to me, reading a book and keeping my feet warm with his.  "I wonder
how many days it would be, if I add them all up, that I've loved you?" I wondered out loud.  

We did the math, smiling at each other when I announced proudly: "5045 days!!"

We've been loving each other, completely and hopelessly and imperfectly, for 5045
days.  How blessed we truly are.  And it was with the awe and wonder of that enormous
number that we set out this weekend on a rock'n'roll babymoon adventure.  My lover and
best friend and companion for the last 5045 days and our unborn son and me.

When I was pregnant for Belle, one of my coworkers asked if Shawn and I were going on
a "babymoon".  I literally laughed out loud, it sounded so silly to me, just the name
alone.  Looking back, I laugh out loud at myself and my clueless, childless 24 year old
attitude.  Of course we didn't need a babymoon: everyday of our lives together was
a babymoon!  All we had was each other, loving and living our lives completely immersed
in each other.  Cut to our second pregnancy with Brees, less time together thanks to fast
paced careers, a busy 6 year old, and the growing list of responsibilities that accompanies
your early thirties.  We embarked on a long weekend roadtrip, just the two of us, spent
some time at the beach, caught a Kings of Leon show, enjoyed a little quality time before
we would have to open our hearts and our lives to another little girl.  We began to
understand the importance of a "babymoon", fully aware of how much time had been
taken from our marriage in order to care for our child, knowing that the time would
continue to be stacked against us once we added another.  And so we grasped on to
our weekend away together and used the connection and strength we obtained from
that quality time to move us forward into the next phase of our journey together.

Needless to say, for this third time around, we REALLY get it.  Alone time is a rarity these
days and, despite our best intentions, we do not always MAKE the time as we should.  We
are guilty of not always putting our marriage first, focusing so much of our attention on
our girls, our home, and our careers that we rely on the unspoken strength of our love to
carry us through at times.  But, this weekend, we took the time.  We left the girls with my
dad and went away.  We talked without being interrupted, slept in, ordered room service,
and fell back into each other's arms.  We held hands at a Black Crowes show, singing along
to "Josephine" with tears in our eyes.  We had dinner with some of our best friends.  We
went to Jazz Fest and danced in the mud to "Lonely Boy".  We took our time, threw out
the schedules, and enjoyed just being Shawn and Liv.  It was our babymoom and, as cheesy as
I once thought that concept was, it was so needed and appreciated.  5045 days later and
that man still gives me butterflies, still makes me laugh like no other.

Shawn decided to set out and gather some festival snacks to get us through the next band.  

One of my favorite parts of Jazz Fest is the food and so I waited anxiously in my lawn chair 

to see what delicious treat he would bring back.  Would it be a shrimp po-boy?  A gyro?  

Maybe a bowl of red beans and rice?  None of the above.  He brought me chocolate 

covered strawberries.  I burst out laughing, what a random choice!  But he rationalized 

his decision in true Shawn fashion: "Babe, it's healthy and junk food all rolled into one!  

Both you and the baby will be happy!".  And so I sat under the beautiful Louisiana sky, 

listened to The Metermen and ate my fresh, chocolate covered strawberries with the 

biggest smile on my face.  What a smart husband.

There's a verse from The Black Crowes' song, "Josephine", that Shawn and I sing to each
other all the time:

No waiting for redemption, no leaving love behind
You got to know where you wanna be, it gets cold outside
It's too late to play it safe so let's let it all ride
Yeah, let's let it all ride, let it all ride

Marriage, though at times full of romance and bliss, is a job that needs attention and great
care.  It is a joining of two souls that requires constant vigilance.  There is no leaving
love behind, love must always be front and center.  And even though our lives get busy
and full, we must commit to setting aside that all important time for each other.  Whether it's
in the form of a babymoon or a late night discussion in the bathroom, we need that time.
"You got to know where you wanna be" and, babe, I wanna be with you.  Always.

Strumming

One day this week, as I was buzzing around the house, methodically performing my daily
tasks, my ears perked up at the sound of something that has been missing from our home
for months: the sound of my husband's guitar.  I dropped my basket, ran into the den,
and gasped when I saw Shawn, strumming his beloved guitar.  Isabelle had wandered into
the room as well and immediately sat down in front of the drums, keeping time to her
Daddy's steady beat.

Strum, strum, strum with one hand.  And with each strum you feel more alive, more
like yourself.  With each strum, you believe that you will rise again.  As the sounds of
the Squier  noisily fill the room, you forget the quiet, dark hours that have stolen your
days.  You forget, if but for a moment, where you are and what has happened.  You just
do what you know how to do: you strum.  With one hand, you make do.  You create
something beautiful with what you have been given.  Because that is who you are.  You
are bound and determined to write a new song, to play a new tune, to strum your guitar
like you were born to do, one way or another.

And we were there to witness this moment.  Isabelle, with her natural gift of rhythm,
thumped on those drums to keep up with your sound.  "Keep going, Daddy.  You've got
this", she cheered you on.  Clapping, singing, arms held high: you've got this.
Keep strumming, you rambling man.  Your song is not yet finished.

 

Voodoo Fest

Shawn and I were blessed to have my mama keep our sweet babies on Friday, affording
us the opportunity to venture out to the Voodoo Music Experience in New Orleans.  Voodoo
is by far our favorite rock music festival for several reasons: it's held on Halloween
weekend every year and the weather is always perfect, there's a wide array of bands and
you get to sample so many different musical styles, and it's held in City Park which gives it
a cool, woodland vibe that never feels overcrowded.  We were extremely nervous and
anxious to leave Brees for the night for the first time, so much so that I didn't even book
our hotel until about 10 minutes before we left our house.  We gave the girls both a
million kisses, packed every single belonging they could have possibly needed for the 24
hours we would be away, gave my mom a ridiculously detailed list that she probably
never even looked at, and headed out.  We spent the 2 and 1/2 hour drive down to the
Big Easy catching up, laughing, and listening to our favorite songs.  By the time we saw
the city skyline ahead of us, we were both excited and ready to enjoy our time
together, knowing that the girls were safe and sound.

We got to Voodoo as soon as the gates opened, our day mapped out with a long list of
bands we were longing to see.  We walked the grounds hand in hand, meeting several
artists and checking out the booths filled with hand made wares, sculptures, and
eclectic characters.  For two people who work full time and spend every waking moment
with their babies, having the opportunity to spend a day walking around aimlessly is
the biggest indulgence.  

Friday's Voodoo Fest crowd was an interesting mix: My Chemical Romance played at
the main stage at 7pm and then Soundgarden played at 9.  This meant that half the fans
were teens-early 20's while the other half of us were 90's grunge 30-40 year olds.
The difference in these concert goers provided Shawn and I with endless amounts of
giggling.  We are self-proclaimed concert experts, having gone to more shows than we
could probably ever count over the course of our 32 years.  We are smart enough to
know that a festival like this requires practical sneakers, a picnic blanket for well
needed breaks, smuggling in bottled water to avoid the overpriced concert prices, toilet
paper in your backpack to survive the porta-pots, and earplugs to make it through the
really heavy bands.  Yes, we wear earplugs to drown out the feedback.  Call us old
fogies, we're confident enough in our coolness.  The mama in my couldn't help but
be concerned for those young girls in high heels, no jacket, drunk by noon.
Lord, they must have had a long day...  

There were some pretty epic moments throughout this day, like being front row
for Ani DiFranco.  

 I've been crushing on Band of Horses for quite some time and seeing them under the
cool, misty Louisiana sky affirmed it: they are incredible.

Then of course there was Soundgarden, a band we have jammed to for almost 20 years.
As each song super sonic rocked our faces off, I kept thinking back to driving around with
my girlfriends after Friday night football games, smoking cigarettes with my brother out
my bedroom window, flannel shirts and my green vinyl Doc Marten's.  Hearing "The Day
I Tried to Live" live, in my favorite city, the love of my life with his arms wrapped
around me: truly an epic moment.

We walked out after the final encore exhausted but blissfully happy.  Spending a whole
day with Shawn, laughing and talking and doing our own thing was a blessing I am
so completely grateful for.  He is absolutely the best friend I could ever ask for and I am
so thankful to have a husband and partner I have so much in common with, so many
similar interests.  We woke up super early the next morning, enjoyed a pancake
breakfast, and raced home to our babies: refreshed, rejuvenated, in love.   

Coffee Talk: The Answers Part 3

A few more of your questions answered, as told through my rambling answers
and a few photos here and there...

6.  Who are your favorite musicians/bands?  What are your 
favorite books? ~ Deanna from Delirious Rhapsody

Music has always been such a big part of my life: from my early childhood, dancing with
my brother to my mother's amazing record collection, to singing in my brother's high
school rock band, "Dysfunctional Family Tree", to sitting on the decks of the ship
while serving in the Navy, listening to Shawn play the guitar and singing our favorite
love songs together.  Our house is always filled with music, either live or blasting
on the stereo.

I was fortunate enough to be a teenager during the 90's grunge era, rocking my Doc
Martens and flannel shirt and devoting my entire heart and soul to the notion that I
would someday be Mrs. Eddie Vedder.  The spirit of that time was ground breaking:
keep your bubble gum pop music and empty lyrics, we're pissed off and we're going to
scream about it!  Kurt Cobain gave us an anthem and Chris Cornell taught us how to use
it.  If you don't know who these people are, it's probably because you had the unfortunate
fate of having to idolize Britney Spears and The Backstreet Boys, so sad.

My favorite type of music is rock, but my taste spans a pretty large spectrum.  I love
indie and folk, grunge and punk, my Southern roots tie me hard to the blues.  I don't
like anything that involves an auto-tuner and overproduced drum machines.  Give
me a guitar, original lyrics, and something to pump my fist to.  Going to shows, seeing
our favorite bands live: it's our passion.  Festivals and rock shows, small clubs and open
mic nights.  We enjoy family jam sessions and sing-a-longs under the stars with
friends.  We've acquired quite an array of musical instruments over the years and
love gathering in a circle, allowing the inspiration and tribal funk to flow.  

Here's an example of what you might hear playing at our house,
a few favorites old and new...

  And reading, oh how I love to read!  My mother didn't allow us to watch very much
TV when we were little: instead encouraging us to play music, sending me to dance
class, weekly trips to the library where I devoured every book I could get my hands on.
She gave us the gift of imagination, showed us the magic that exists when you loose
yourself in a piece of literature, in a beautiful song.  It's something I hope to pass on
to my children as well.

I get obsessed with reading series.  It all started with Anne Rice back in junior high:
I read through her entire vampire series and LOVED it.  I love series that create a
whole other world, developing characters and places and pulling you in, making you
want to know more and more.  Some of my other favorites are the Sookie Stackhouse
series, Philipa Gregory's historical fiction novels about the Tudor dynasty, Harry Potter,
and The Twilight books. I also love biographies and a good love story every now and
then.  Basically, I just love to read and try to make time for a good book whenever
I can squeeze it in...

7.  As a current Med/Surg nurse looking for something new on the 
nursing frontier, I was curious as to how you like home health nursing! 
What made you decide to pursue that change in your career? 
~ Alyssa from The Lovely Things in Life 

Nursing truly is an amazing career: we have so many options of what we can do, places
we can go, different patient populations to work with.  The freedom and endless
possibilities are what drew me to nursing in the first place.  I love the fact that my career
can change with my lifestyle.  I was a Med-Surg nurse for several years and loved it.  I
loved the adrenaline rush of caring for critically ill patients, the fast pace, and the
interesting array of situations my job put me in.  But then, we had our second child and
my life got a little more full.  I suddenly started to dread going to work, the thought of
being away from home for 12 hours began to seem daunting.  I could feel me heart
breaking more and more each week.

I made the decision to find a new job that would provide hours more conducive to raising
my daughters and spending time with my husband.  After making a million lists of pros
and cons, networking my butt off, and praying for the right opportunity, I was offered
a job with a local, fast growing home health company.  So far, I LOVE it!  The hours
are amazing: I work from 8 am until 2-3 pm Monday-Friday, no nights, no holidays,
no weekends.  I am able to get Isabelle off to school and I am home when she gets off
the school bus everyday.  I only have to miss one feeding with my little Brees.  I have
dinner on the table every night and every weekend off.  My patients are adorable and
the nature of the job is bringing out different skills in my nursing repertoire that I
haven't honed in on thus far: being a home health nurse requires a lot of assessment skills
and putting the whole picture together.  It's incredibly rewarding to walk into a home,
assess the situation holistically, and then make critical thinking decisions to improve
the problems that have been contributing to a patient's illness.  I like the fact that I am
on my own, making my own schedule and responsible for my day and my patients.
The ability to be autonomous is amazing and it is forcing me to grow in my
knowledge base.

The only down side I see so far is using my car for work.  While I am reimbursed by
my company for mileage, the wear and tear on my vehicle will eventually catch up.
But really, what more could you want than cruising around in your own car all day,
listening to your favorite tunes, taking care of people in need?  No boss breathing down
your neck, no catty office politics?  My company views me as an educated individual
capable of performing my work to the highest standard, therefore there's no
micro-managing.  Just a nurse on the open highway!  Shawn and I thought long and
hard about what was best for our family, our sanity, and our finances.  God really
blessed us with this job because it truly has benefited all of those aspects.  For now, this
job is perfect for our lifestyle and where I am in my career.  And when our needs
change and this job no longer suits us, I'll set off in search of something else that
does.  Nursing equals job security and, in this day and age, that in itself
is a blessing!!

Good luck with your journey, Alyssa!!

Mondays Come Too Soon

This weekend was laid back and full of fun.  We celebrated a dear friend's birthday with
good food and a water slide, had a lovely date night out that completely rejuvenated us,
and caught up on our rest with a nap or two.  We had a pool party planned for
Sunday afternoon with our friends and cousins but the big Louisiana sky decided to open
up and rain on down instead.  So, we spent the afternoon cuddled up on the couch with a
few books and a movie, which really turned out to be perfect.  Shawn and I played a
little guitar and the girls enjoyed their new favorite game: Mama and Her Baby.  We
also realized it is beyond time to purchase a reliable baby gate as we watched Brees climb
all the way to the top of the stairs, her big sister giggling the whole way.  A safety briefing
was held for Mama and Her Baby with strict instructions on stair restrictions.  The jury is
still out on whether or not they heard a single word as they were too busy plotting their
next mission.
Oh boy.

 

The Episodes

Summer is here, the children are out of school, the grown-ups have fire in their bones and are ready to create and express.  It's such a care-free, inspiring time of year.  The sun is out and the days stretch so much longer, giving you a sense of possibility and endless potential.  I created a list of goals for our family, hopes and dreams for how we might spend our days together, and we have already begun pouring through the list and enjoying various activities.

This afternoon, we gathered in our music room with our best friends and created a musical feast.  We strummed guitars, pounded on drums, and shook our tambourines to a groovy beat.  The babies stomped and sang, writing their own lyrics about family and unicorns.  

 My brother and I spent our childhood afternoons teaching ourselves all our favorite songs, learning harmonies and guitar solos.  My mother limited our TV time and instead encouraged us to express ourselves through music, sending us to dance class, pushed us outdoors and into the wild.  We learned so much by keeping our heads and hands busy, learning to occupy our time with productive and creative passions.  I can only hope to pass these qualities on to my own children, encouraging them to find their niche and allowing them to reach their full potential, all while being able to spend time with family and enjoy their days as much as possible.

Shawn and I have an amazing collection of instruments including guitars, various drums, a harmonica collection, and lots of movers and shakers.  Shawn's most prized possession is his great-grandfather's Gibson acoustic, an amazing guitar that his grandmother left to him when she passed away.  My mother gave us my grandfather's harmonica, purchased back in the 1940's when my grandfather was in Germany serving in the Army.  Such incredible pieces not only make beautiful music, but they carry on family legacies and serve as sentimental treasures.  I spent so many afternoons with my grandfather on his porch swing, listening to him play along to Johnny Cash and Muddy Waters.  The sound of that beautiful instrument warms my heart every time I hear it, bringing me back to the arms of an amazing man.

    It was a beautiful afternoon full of noise and chaos.  We promised each other to do it again, soon, and often.  Seeing those sweet faces dancing so free, singing words straight from their hearts, was the most inspirational sight I've witnessed all week...