Dancing and Praise

This weekend was Isabelle's 6th dance recital, a chance for us to sit back and witness all of 
the hard work our little girl has put into her talent this year.  She performed a classical 
ballet piece and a tap routine and we could not have been more proud.  Isabelle loves 
to perform, she is completely calm and cool under pressure and you can tell while 
watching her how much she truly loves being on that stage.  Brees was mesmerized as 
she watched her big sister up on stage.  She waved and called out to her from the 
audience, "Sissy!!  Sissy!!", Isabelle's own personal cheering squad.  She earned a new 
trophy to add to her growing collection and a ton of compliments and well wishes from 
her teacher and peers.  I only cried a little bit, wiping my proud mama tears away as my 
little girl twirled and pranced around the stage, her technique much improved since last 
year.  She was awesome, in every single way, and I just love her so.  

After recital, we made our way over to my cousin's high school graduation party: a 
gathering of our big family on the back porch with tons of food, good dancing music, and 
the best company you could hope for on a Saturday night.  We danced and danced, took 
turns swinging kids, and ate to our hearts' content.  The little cousins entertained each 
other for hours and I stole away for a few slow dances with my husband.  By the time we 
got home, it was almost midnight and we were all delirious.  So many milestones take place 
this time of year: graduations and weddings and showers and ceremonies.  It's a time of 
year that feels full of possibility, new beginnings, farewells and welcome homes.  It's a time 
to reflect on the power of hard work and dedication and to come together with the ones 
you love to say job well done.  And this family, well, we love any excuse to get together 
and celebrate the ones we love!

 

Wordful Wednesday

We had family night at dance class last week: a super special night where mamas and 
daddies and little baby sisters get to watch their big girl show off her mad skills.  It's the 
only time we are allowed into the dance studio to peek in on our girls so I look forward to 
it every year.  Isabelle was excited but confided in me that she was a bit nervous for me 
to watch her.  She was moved to a Level 2 class this year: a class for more experienced 
dancers that focuses more intently on technique and form.  I've noticed a change in 
her dancing just from watching her twirl around the house: her arms are more precise, her 
feet are learning the fine art of turn out.  She's in a black leotard with white tights, code 
for "I'm a big girl now".  She can make her own bun and tie her own ballet slippers.  Our 
little girl is maturing into a beautiful young ballerina and I couldn't be more proud.  
Neither could her sister who spent the entire class cheering and imitating the big girls from
the sidelines.  I had to wrangle Brees in quite a few times as the spirit of the dancers called 
her in, tempting her to run out onto the floor and join in on the fun.  Though Belle did her 
best to stay focused and centered throughout the class, I caught her glancing our way quite 
a few times, checking to make sure we were watching.  Do you remember that feeling 
when your family showed up to watch you do something you love?  Wanting to do your 
best and show off your passion?  Belle, you are an amazing little dancer and watching 
your talent grow is a true joy.  Have fun this year, learn as much as you can, and dance 
big!!  Your talent is a true gift to behold!!   

 

Tiny Dancer

This year marked Isabelle's 5th year of classical ballet, tap, and jazz training with her 

dance company.  Week after week, she has strapped on her ballet slippers and perfected 

her technique, spending hours at the ballet barre.  She's a natural born performer, a lover 

of the lights and stage, and watching her grow as a dancer has made me the happiest

 mama.  When your child has a passion, a real interest in learning and growing in their 

craft, it is incredibly inspiring.  I've never pushed her or put any expectations on her, 

I've tried to just sit back and allow her to navigate her own way through her hobbies, 

delving deeper only when she has been ready.  With dance, she dove in head first, 

allowing herself to fall deeply and madly in love with the art of creative movement.  

Isabelle, we are so incredibly proud of you for all that you have accomplished this year. 

 I cried as I watched you on stage, your smile shining brighter than any star in the sky.

  You are so talented and beautiful, a true joy to watch.  I pray that you will always 

find peace and happiness doing things you enjoy, allowing your heart to grow in strength 

and faith in yourself.  For you can do anything, my sweet girl, that you set your mind to.

Here's to another amazing year, tiny dancer!! 

 

Tiny Dancer

Last week, Isabelle and her dance company took their annual portraits.  I helped
my daughter dress in her newest tutu, strapped on her ballet slippers and beamed as
she posed with toes pointed and arms in fourth position.  This marks her fifth year of
study with Motions Dance Studio and her talent has grown by leaps and bounds, literally.
I stood back and watched as Belle stood patiently in line with the other students, waiting
to have her photos taken.  She walked confidently in front of the camera, took direction
from her teacher, smiled her beautiful and enchanting smile.  My heart felt so proud as
I watched my graceful daughter, witnessed her fully alive and in her element.  She
loves dancing and performing so much and it shows in these pictures.  I am proud of
the confident and charismatic young lady she is growing into.  Dancing is her creative outlet,
it is her God given talent.  Every week, she attends dance class and gives it her all,
dedicating herself to being the best ballerina she can be.  She practices in our kitchen while
I make dinner, showing her baby sister how to bourree and developpe.  She talks of
someday performing professionally.  I have no doubt that this little girl could make
that dream a reality.

Isabelle, you are truly a shining star, inside and out.  Continue to follow your dreams
and dance like no one's watching.  Work hard and enjoy each moment you spend on stage.
We are your biggest cheerleaders, your proudest supporters.
I love you and all that you are.

Photos courtesy of the very talented Chris Brouillette.  

Hospital Story of the Week

I had the honor of caring for an 85 year old Army two time war veteran this week.  He
was the sweetest, funniest patient I have had in a while and I found excuses to go into
his room all day.  I sat with him as he ate his lunch, listening to his stories about being
stationed in Germany during World War II and raising crops of corn while his small
children ran under their mother's skirt.  When he was done eating, I helped him stand
up from his chair and maneuver back into his bed.  He was very weak, his big
heart overworked and his body tired.  I wrapped my arms around his waist and held
him steady, our cheeks side by side as I encouraged him to take his time, reassuring him
that I was holding on tight.  

"It's like we're dancing", he said quietly, patting me softly on my back.

"We sure are.  Nurses love to dance, you know", I said with a wink.

After a few moments of swaying back and forth, catching his breathe and regaining
his balance, I got my sweet patient comfortably back in bed.  "I used to love to dance.  I
can't tell you how many nights I spent dancing with my wife: in the kitchen after supper,
out in our yard, at my daughter's wedding.  We used to love to dance.  It's one of the joys
I miss the most about being young and healthy, being able to move and tap my feet.  One
of the things I miss most about my wife, seeing her float across the floor".

I felt a lump in my throat, my heart swelling as I listened to him reminisce about one of
life's most simple pleasures.  I sat down next to him again, forgetting about the hundreds
of other tasks I needed to get to, and listened to him tell me about his wife of 50 years
and their many adventures together.  He told me about teaching his daughter to dance
before her first prom, showing his son the proper way to hold a woman during a waltz.
He proudly told of his wife's grace and charm and how she always insisted on leading,
causing him to occasionally step on her delicate feet.  I listened to his stories and saw his
pride beam brighter than the sun pouring through the window, remembering his body and
its abilities.

He eventually grew tired and drifted off to sleep.  I imagine he dreamed of floating
through the clouds with his lady, two stepping the day away.  As I left his room, I reflected
on my own love for dance and the many memories I already have of moving back and forth
to my favorite songs, the nights under the stars, in the kitchen, little girls standing on top
of their Daddy's feet.  After work that night, when Shawn and I had put the girls to bed
and the day's responsibilities were done, I reached for his hand and said,
"Dance with me".

"Right now?" he asked, most likely surprised that I even had any energy left after such
a long day.  

"Yes, right now".  As we floated in each other's arms across the kitchen floor, lazily swaying
to the beat of our favorite Black Keys song, I told him the story of my dancing patient.
I shared the inspiration this man had blessed me with, the simplicity of his
message resonating so deep inside my soul.  He held me close, listening intently, taking
in the moment.  And we danced, as we have done so many times in our years together.  

We danced.

 I learn so much from my patients, mostly about life and its fragility, how quickly it truly
does pass by.  From this particular patient, I took with me the reminder to enjoy the
simple pleasures.  To take my man by the hand as often as possible and sway and groove
and rock to the beat, to grab my little girls and swing them around in the moonlight.  I
took with me the advice to stop what you are doing when your favorite song comes on,
wrap your arms around the person you love, and dance.
For no other reason than because you can.

Tiny Dancer

Isabelle performed in her fourth dance recital on Saturday.  She has been studying ballet, tap, and jazz since she was three years old and has such a natural, raw talent.  She's had a great sense of rhythm since she was a baby, shaking her hips and bouncing along to her Daddy's guitar.  This year, she advanced from a Primary to a Level 1 class, building on the fundamental elements she has learned in years past and really developing a strong sense of technique.  She has a real passion for dance and looks forward to her weekly class with great joy.  

I myself have danced my whole life.  It is such a big part of who I am and has afforded me so many adventures and life lessons.  Dance has created a bond between my daughter and I, allowing us to share a passion and understanding of one another.  This year was the first time I watched the show from the audience:  a mom, not a choreographer or performer.  I performed in my last show when I was four months pregnant with Brees and decided to hang my ballet slippers up this year to focus on our growing family.  It was wonderful to sit back and watch my sweet girl shine, allowing her to be in the spotlight and live through her moment.  But part of me was longing to be on that stage more than anything.  Something inside of me felt a pull, a yearning for the feel of the lights.  I think those types of feelings are healthy, they are motivating and inspiring.  I will be ready to take to the ballet bar again one day soon.  But, for now, I enjoyed being able to sit back and enjoy the show, to snap photos relentlessly, to bring her flowers and ooh and ahh over her medal.  And when she spotted me in the audience and gave me a wink, my heart knew that this was exactly where I was supposed to be.

     
  She was perfect, smiled beautifully and looked like she was genuinely enjoying herself.  We were amazed with how much she has matured this past year performance-wise.  She carried herself so well and didn't seem the least bit nervous.  Brees watched the whole show with her big, bright eyes.  I wonder if she inherited the same dance gene?  What will her passion be?  Will I have two little girls in tutus?  I look forward to watching them both grow and discover their interests, whatever they may be.

As we were driving home, I caught a glimpse of her ballet slippers as she propped her tired feet up.  What a testimony these are to her busy year, the countless hours of plies, jetes, and releveres.  These are definitely going in the memory box, a treasure I will keep forever and visit for inspiration. 

Inspire

I have been dancing since I was three years old. Ballet, tap, contemporary, jazz. Nothing makes

me feel more alive, more creative, more in tune with who I am than when I am dancing. I miss it. I performed in my last recital when I was 16 weeks pregnant with Brees. When fall classes started, I was too far into my pregnancy to continue. I told myself that

I would start again this spring, but trying to balance work, breastfeeding, and enjoying my children at this precious age has taken priority. It's such a difficult thing, the balance. Maintaining who you are while still giving of yourself to all who need you. It sometimes makes for some very difficult decisions.

Not that I'm not loving where I am in my life right now, though. I seriously couldn't be happier. I absolutely love being a nurse and am so thankful to have a career that is so fulfilling and also offers my family financial security and benefits. And on the four days a week that I am not working, I get to be home with my sweet angel baby and volunteer at Isabelle's school. What a blessing to be able to work and still be involved in my children's daily lives!!

But I'm itching to strap on a pair of ballet shoes. I'm craving that physical creativity. There's a little voice inside my head that doesn't want me to forget that part of myself.

So, maybe it's time to listen to that voice, use it as motivation, let it fuel me for the months ahead. Is it feasible to go back to dance class right now? Probably not. Does that mean that the opportunity won't present itself again in the future? Hell no!! There will be a time, a season, when I will run back onto that stage with a vengeance! There will be a season when my kids are a little older, my job more conducive, my time more flexible. And when that happens, I will dust off my gear, warm up these old bones, and DANCE!!!! I will get back into the medium that allows me to be an artist, affords me the chance to have something that is all mine...

And I will be a better mother for it. Because I will be showing my girls what it means to be dedicated to a passion. I will encourage them to never stop doing the things that you love, even if it means you have to keep it tucked away for a while....